Obliged to see

Improvising, accepting, closing eyes, my smiles
Unbeseeched for each awakening deserves its own,
Spontaneous distortion of expression suggesting
Fondness in being me, a human amongst others,
Permanently contradicting prospects of random sadness.
On occasion ineluctably dejected, as now,
On a plane fed, duty-free shopping done. Miniature
Liqueur bottles reminding me the depressing nature
Of alcohol eliciting my present gloom, submitting
To its essence, without the shadow of a fight.
Experience gave some the opportunity to declare
Me mentally unstable, talks of chemical imbalance
As tears roll down my eyes, salty taste on my lips,
Drops of ocean when even rain is sweeter than me.
Though familiar, grief has altered its character.
Uncalling for despair nor asking me to change,
This sorrow rises from the ashes of evolution, as I
Pretend not to see while nothing passes unremarked.
My eyes recognise the futility of their bogus openness,
While blindness is unable to encourage willed ignorance.
Consciousness alone compels to absorb the scenery
For scenarios retinas refuse to grasp, neglecting mind’s
Solitary drive, to live withstanding all and comprehend,
Embracing realities encompassing humankind, so that I
Have no excuse and remain obliged, to see.
[Featured painting: Eye by Michael R Grine]